Armchair Expert

Sitting in you chair,

Glasses on, studying the world,

You’re the armchair expert.

Let the fanfare and flags unfurl.

Yeah, you’re the expert, you sitting there,

You know it all, the judge of everything,

You been there, you’ve been everywhere.

Tried everyone’s shoes, then thrown ’em in the bin.

Your life is all about other’s lives

You look so close, you forget about yours.

Armchair critic, calling every dive,

But never actually out on the course.

Armchair expert, calling shots on everything you please.

But the truth, the whole truth is,

You don’t know what the heck it is,

And you should be minding your own business.

It seems to be your life is all about wrecking

The lives of others who have worked so hard,

Well one day you’ll be crying,

And good luck with the get well card.

Armchair expert, think before you write,

Because one day you will reap what you sow,

All those  fables, accusations, misinformation, and lies,

Will one day return to say hello.

It’s probably a good thing I can’t actually see,

You’re cowardly face, otherwise I have this feeling,

That a righteous rage would overtake me

And have you falling from your lofty ceiling.

Armchair expert, before you speak,

Why don’t you get on your damn bike and ride?

Naw, because you’re a coward and weak,

You don’t want to see the other side.

Damn, you armchair experts, you are too much.

God, I’ve been one myself now and then.

Please, shut your foolish mouths, before your teeth crunch.

What we need are more men, who don’t destroy better men.

Armchair expert, armchair expert. Think you know it all,

But you’re just a pathetic piece of work,

Who can’t do what you speak of at all,

You’re just a pathetic armchair expert, studying the boring paintwork.


Story behind the poem:

Me airing my frustrations. I’m sick of hearing the crap about Lance Armstrong and doping and cycling. All these ‘experts’ don’t know a thing about what they are saying, yet they seem to know everything about cycling! (sic)

Quote verbatim: “Do i trust cycling? No. Never have, never will. It’s a sport for cheaters not athletes.”

The anonymous person who said this . . . I have a public personal msg for: Hey buddy, have you ever actually got on a bike and tried cycling FULL OUT for even FIFTEEN minutes???!!!! You have no problems with calling cycling a sport for cheats, but I bet you that you couldn’t even do a quarter of what these guys can do. Even if they are doping, the cyclists do amazing things. Shut your pathetic mouth unless you’ve actually been in their shoes. Cyclist are some of the most fittest athletes in the world, even without drugs. You blithering ignorant fool. You are so quick to judge what you can’t even come close to. If you had come close to it, you wouldn’t be so hasty with your words.

Ok. Now that I’ve finished my rant. 😀 I guess it’s true that we can all be armchair experts at times. People who sit in chairs and pretend to know it all. We have to watch ourselves. Yes, I put my hand up, I have been an armchair critic.

Judge not that ye be not judged. In the aftermath of the USADA bold move, so many people are coming light now speaking their ‘expert’ minds. Please, shut up and move on. The poor guy has went through enough without people, who don’t know a think about cycling, judging him.

I still support Lance Armstrong. 😀




Mat 7:1 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
Mat 7:2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.


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