Sea of Indecision

Down inside me

You’ll find a sea

Where no sailor

Did sail or swore

Where no waves fall

Nor seagulls call

Wind changes like time

Having four minds

North, East, South, West

There is no rest

Sometimes a breeze

The heat to ease

Sometimes a gale

You can’t prevail

Where waters blue

Hypnotize you

Sea sirens sing

Doom impending

Death sounds so sweet

Sung from their lips

You fall asleep

Wake six feet deep

Here in the blue

A ship sees you

A single ship

Here doth now slip

Battered wood beams

Tattered sail seams

Splintering deck

Speed tis wind-checked

Wallowing still

Yet free of will

Yet not moving

For not choosing

The captain here

He’s full of fear

He no sailor –

A voyager

Who fell asleep

And drifted deep

He found himself

Stuck in this gulf

With no compass

No man to ask

Watching time pass

Growing old fast

Tales of heros

His own ethos

Call to action

He’s distracted


Green and bold rings

Of pieces of land

We call islands


By gulfs between

So that one choice

All he can voice

For to arrive

Will take such time

To get to one

Your life is done

So he delays

In the blue stays

Drifting here, there

Going nowhere

The sea of indecision

Claiming yet another victim


Remember Me


Remember me, not as the fool who loved thee

But as the lover who scorned thee.

Not as the boy who drowned in the sea,

But as the he who left you in the shallows to swim deep.

Remember me, not as the fallen, bloody body on the ground

But as the hero who rose above the enemies around.

Not as a soul lost in defeat, slain after having fallen down –

But as a warrior whose hands were never bound.

Remember me, as the shining light, an example to tell.

Not the one who stumbled and fell.

Not the one who ran when the walls fell

Rather he who stood tall amidst the waves of hell.

Remember me, not as he who died, but he who lived.

The weary man who rose and triumphed!

He who when the night was at it’s darkest, strived

Till the morning broke forth with radiant light.

Remember me, as I was in my glory days,

Before time didst wreck me with it’s constant sway.

And I became nothing more, save

A wreck that lay beneath the ocean waves.

Story behind the poem:

Remember me. In the words of Nehemiah, “Remember me, O my God, for good.”

I pray that people remember me for my moments of brilliance, as opposed to an age of devastation.


photo by Alen Stojanac

A Random List

So, I finally decide to clean my room, after 2 months. Ok, I’m not done, but I’m almost a quarter of the way through. 😉

So far, this is what I’ve found:

  • 4 pairs of work uniforms
  • 8+ pairs of other clothes
  • 20+ pens strategically placed amidst the mess
  • 15+ balloons
  • whistle
  • bike lights
  • batteries with no power left
  • batteries with power still (well, we don’t actually know. There’s too many of them to check, and not enough time)
  • a lone piece of tobelrone chocolate. (that made for a tasty morning snack)
  • 5 muesli bar wrappers
  • 20 chocolate wrappers
  • 100+ shopping dockets, covering the essentials such as food, to the non-essentials, like a lodging receipt
  • unmarked discs with something burnt on them, but hey, who’s got the time to check what’s on them? Not me
  • about 4 different draft manuscripts
  • a 8 gb SD card, that disappeared as soon as I turned away. (I’m still looking for it now)
  • 50 nerf bullets. (it’s a lot of effort to load them back in a Raider)
  • guitar
  • coathangers
  • video camera
  • SLR camera
  • $30 movie gift card (I wonder when that expires . . .)
  • 15 books scattered around to make it a bit harder to walk on the floor
  • sunglasses that have been missing for a couple of weeks

Aaagh. It’s a bachelor’s life . . . . . Happy holidays all. (for those lucky enough to actually have holidays . . . .)


Oh, and I forgot to mention the packet of spaghetti I found. That was stored in the corner of my room in case of a zombie apocalypse.

Bus Window

Sitting here staring out a bus window,
Watching all the cars and people below.
Hustling here hustling there,
Just another work day’s fare.
Faces, all grey and stressed, wondering if they passed the test:
Dark rings and slumped shoulders, the defeated and in need of rest.
Sitting here doing nothing
I’m just sitting here thinking.
For a brief moment my life’s suspended.
The headstrong king temporarily absconded.
Up here everything takes on dimensions new.
U get to see my life in a whole new view.
Thirty minutes, staring out a bus window,
Realising things that I wouldn’t have known,
All cause I’m on a bus staring out the window,
With nowhere else to go.
Lull me to sleep, throbbing engine fades away.
Come now child, everything’s gonna be ok.
My stop’s coming up, don’t make me, please.
But life never listens to our fragile pleas.
Oh why, oh why, do U have to get off here?
I want to stay here suspended in serenity.

Story behind the poem:
This poem was written on a . . . bus. Surprised? I love riding on buses. It makes me slow down for a few minutes and think. Bus windows, they make us think.
Feeling stressed? Go hope on a bus 🙂

I’ll be a Wall

Watching you stand next to me, your little hands clutch my fingers as you say,
Piggy back, give me a piggy back. Really, I just can’t resist a request said like that.

Pick you up, place you on my shoulders, carry you through the bush, over boulders.
Hear you squeal as the branches fall in your face, clap your hands, urge me to pick up the pace.

Watching you stand next to me, a little man. Your hand ain’t even half my hand.
You challenge me to wrestle, we fight and tussle, finally you emerge on top, victor of the battle.

Lying here on my belly, you the conqueror, smiling to myself, as you chant like a little warrior.
So little and small in the big picture, so innocent. You’re so happy, yet so dependent.

If ever those giants come to fight, if ever the dragons breath their fire, or the monsters at night,
I’ll be there, by your side. Here you’re sitting on top, the victor, but i’ll be ready come any danger.

I’ll be a shield, a bear, wall, when the stones fly, the pillagers come, and the thunder rolls.
Nothing will touch you, when I’m here, as long as I’m round, you’ve got nothing to fear.

To get to you, they’ll run into me, any enemies, stones, waves, or winds, come hit me.
For you, I’ll give my life, I’d place all I have on the line, just to make sure you get out fine.

I wrap my arms around your squirming body, as you pummel my face,
You think you’re so strong, and I hope that nothing will ever prove you wrong.

If ever the waves or winds break you down, you know where help will always be found.
Cause they’ll have to come through me to get to you, I’ll give my life up, if that’s what I’ve got to do.

You’re sitting on top right now, little guy, ignorant of the dangers circling about.
But never worry, never fear, cause when they come, I’ll be right here.

If ever danger threatens, I’ll be standing there between, you and the danger, seen or unseen.

When those giants acall, dragons roar, and thunder rolls, I’ll be a shield, knight, and wall.



Story behind the poem:

Written about this little boy I know, who’s absolutely adorable (to me anyway). It breaks my heart to see how many kids get abused and scarred by the very people who are suppose to protect them. And well, this is my little message, not just for this boy, but for every other kid who I’ve spent time with, I want to be a wall that provides shelter from the storms. When those giants come, I want to be there to help fight them off. If I get the chance, I will place myself between the attackers and you. If it comes down to the last straw, I’ll give my life to protect you. All you little guys and gals (ok, some of you are not so little anymore now. :P), you’re really special to me. I hope you have lots of walls and shields to protect you. 😀